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Donna Perugini Children's Author

Just Don’t Wait!

There are things to think about before situations arise that will be heartbreaking 

 
What started me thinking was a one young woman’s response to her Grandmother having passed away two years ago.  She loves her Grandmother dearly and remembered the great recipes she would make.  She always wanted one thing from her Grandmother…her recipe box.  When she went to her Grandmother’s home which was being cleared out after her death, she found that someone had thrown away the recipe box with all the recipes.  How sad. 

While posting comments on another blog, I came up with these thoughts. This goes both ways for the younger generation with young families to the grandparents who are becoming older.

 

Talk With Your Grandparent

 
Is there a way to communicate with the elderly what we love about them, our memories of what we love about them and what we would like to have if they were no longer here?  Yes, and it begins with the young people talking about their feelings and desires.  Of course the young people need to be respectful about approaching the Grandparents.  It could come off as a very selfish action on their part unless the love comes through when you talk with them.  Start talking with them as soon as you are cognizant of your thoughts, memories, desires and love for them.  When we are very young it’s all about us.  We love the attention they give us, the gifts, the unadulterated love they pour out on us.  We even begin to think we deserve it!  Grandparents are a blessing from God.  When you discover what a treasure they are, take the time to be with them, love them, listen to them tell you things, honor them.  They will not be with you forever. 

While you’re establishing this relationship with them, you’ll have certain attachments to things they have that remind you of their relationship with you.  Talk about that with them.

 

Video Taping Your Time Together

 

If you love baking with Grandmother, tell her how much you love that time with her.  Video tape her baking your favorite goodie and have her show how she measures out the items.  Many Grandmothers do the ‘a little pinch of this and a handful of that’ measurement.  Have her toss that measure of flour or sugar into a measuring cup for your sake!  At least you’ll have an idea of what goes into the recipe.  Talk to her while you’re video taping and ask her questions while she’s mixing things up.  You will treasure this video forever!  You could even make copies for Christmas gifts for other relatives as there may be more of you that love her baking.

 

What Do I Say and How Do I Say That?

 

When you talk about the great recipes, ask if some day you can have her recipe book or box for your very own.  Tell her it would be a treasure to you.  Ask her if you could put your name as a label on the book and have her sign the label to okay you receiving it when she’s gone.  Be careful how you talk about her ‘being gone’ as it may bother her.  As Christians we talk about our “Moving Day” or “Going Home to be with The Lord”.  We know we’ll all meet up again when we’re all gone from this earth.  Be aware of how your grandparent feels about it before talking about ‘getting their stuff’.  You are being advised here not to talk like you just want what they have.  You’ll want to talk about the memories, the affection and the meaning of the item to you. 

 

Will You Have Regrets?

 

Young people, start approaching the idea of it now.  If you wait thinking you’re being polite or don’t know how to approach the subject, you may eventually find that the item is gone forever.  There are many family members that have the idea that something will be theirs some day. 

Once you’ve:

  • talked about it with Grandmother,
  • marked the item with your name and her signature
  • talk around the family about how you’ve talked with Grandmother about inheriting it 

 

Resolve any issues before Grandmother is no longer with you

 

If more family than you wants the recipes, share them by copying for those who are requesting to have them too.  Just don’t wait!

 

Would you regret not talking with your Grandparent?
Have you approached them in a unique way?  Tell us!  Leave a comment

 

One Response to “Just Don’t Wait!”

  1. 1
    Donna Perugini says:

    Sometimes you have to ask a parent for the item that you and your grandparents shared because they passed away before you became old enough to know what it means to you. Share that memory with them and talk about your grandparents with them. Your parents would appreciate the fact that you cared about and loved their parents.

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