Boundaries for Our Children Mean What?
- Ready for a new series? Or try my children’s book series www.DonnaPerugini.com
“People with boundary problems usually have distorted attitudes about responsibility. They feel that to hold people responsible for their feelings, choices and behaviors is mean. However, Proverbs repeatedly says that setting limits and accepting responsibility will save lives Prov. 13:18, 24”
Does that catch your attention? I can give numerous episodes in my life that related to that quote from the book, Boundaries…When to Say YES When to Say NO To Take Control of Your Life by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.
Boundary Needs for Children of Alcoholics
Were your parents or parent alcoholics?
“Alcoholism causes massive boundary confusion in the child. Adult children of alcoholics never feel safe in relationships. They’re always waiting for the other person to let them down or attack them unexpectedly. They keep their guard up constantly.”
Massive boundary confusion is something you need to take into account when you are old enough to understand you need a real life change. Imagine passing on those boundary problems to your children.
How Can You Help Your Children With Boundaries?
Are you interested in other ways we can help our children with boundaries? Join me in a Boundaries series meant to help us and the next generation. Discover the stages your child goes through to have healthy boundaries in their life. Then see how to help yourself and your children with understanding others boundary lines.
I’ll leave you with a common boundary problem. Trying to lay the responsibility for their actions on someone else, your child may use the phrases, “I had to” or “She/he made me” when they explain why they did or did not do something. Your child is thinking someone else is in control, relieving them of their basic responsibility. Learn about teaching your child boundary setting and this can be changed!
Be sure to leave comments for all the readers in our community. We learn from you too!
I’ve read a few portions of the ‘boudaries’ books and have found them to be super helpful and *freeing* in my dealings with some difficult people in my life past & present.
Should be a great series, Donna. 🙂
heidi @ wonder woman wannabe recently posted..Interview with a Blogger – Sarah of Clover Lane
I had not picked up the book for a long time. Once I saw myself in it again it was shocking at how much I slid back into the previous problematic mode. Here’s the horror of it: My daughter has a tendency toward my issue and now our teenage granddaughter is in the same battle. My mother also exhibited the same problem.
I’m a living example of how ‘issues’ and dealing with them are passed down in families. It really is generational. Time to break that tradition!!
I can relate to the statement about adult children of alcoholics. My dad is one, and I find that to be true to some extent. So thankful for the work of the Cross in my life! And the continuing work of Holy Spirit!
Can’t wait to read more of this series!
Becky recently posted..Real Hot Cocoa
Agreeing with your statement about the work of the Cross and continuing work of the Holy Spirit can bring you through anything in your past.
How is it that you keep doing series that I REALLY need to read? Seriously, Donna, you rock!
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Audra,
Those are words of high praise! Thank you.
I started this series because I needed it again and so that the young mothers could have a chance to ‘build their little one’s boundaries’ intentionally. It’s a win-win!