Benefits of untangling conflicts as a way of life. Photo credit Ambro

To catch up with

 the first 3 steps untangling conflicts part one can be found in the last post.  Quickly covering the first 3 steps:

Step 1: What do you really want?

Step 2: Gather information that’s helpful

Step 3: What’s Your Negotiation Process?

Go to the posting for more expanded definitions. 

Step 4:  Send the Right Message

Talk positively about coming to an understanding. There is more than one way to reach that understanding, so consider other alternative ways to come to a resolution to the conflict. 

Step 5: Negotiate

You’ll both need to take turns letting each other air their concerns and thoughts.  When you want to answer something the other party brought up, repeat back to them what you heard them say.  It will clear up any misunderstandings about what is ‘meant’ versus what is ‘spoken’.  Sometimes our minds go way beyond what we get a chance to speak out and taking a few moments to truly understand the other person shows you care, are interested and want to communicate. 

Remember your goals, avoid berating and blaming, and take a break if you’re feeling your emotions boil over again. 

You have all the information you need to make wise choices in untangling conflicts, but let me add a very powerful part to this.  Once you have forgiven the other party, you can pray and ask for wisdom in how to proceed.  Once you’ve prayed, thank God for the answer.  When you’re in the discussing mode with the other party, lean on the Holy Spirit inside you.  For the born again believer, it says in your bible that He will lead and counsel you.  That’s a promise in the bible that you can ‘hang your hat on’. 

You may take the ‘passive’ role and try to ignore what’s going on between you and others.  Nothing changes in that atmosphere.  It’s been said that a sign of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.  Begin a lifetime habit of untangling any conflicts you will encounter…it’s worth it!

Have you had any untangling successes in your life?  Share them with the readers who can profit from your comments!   Have you shared this with your Facebook Friends?  Click the ‘Like’ button below..